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STORIES WITH PURPOSE
I’M CONFIDENT IN MY DECISIONS BECAUSE OF GOD
Louise Aguarin-Alvaro: My friends would describe me as outgoing, decisive, and confident. My parents would say I’m a smart girl. I’m a scientist. But I cannot cook. Seriously, with God’s help I’ve researched cancer and worked on cutting edge technology to develop medicines, but I struggle with cooking adobo.
And It’s because of struggles, like not being able to cook, I tend to second guess myself… Am I making the right career moves? Was I clear in that meeting? Did I lock the front door? I have my moments of self-doubt…
I remember just days before I moved from San Francisco to Philadelphia for my graduate program, I got nervous. What if it was going to be a mistake? What if I don’t make any friends? And the biggest what if, What if I’m not smart enough and I fail?
When I doubt myself, I look in the mirror and I say to myself “You’re Louise, You is smart, You is Kind, You is important!” But on a serious note, when I doubt myself, I pray and I ask God to help me to make the right decisions.
Do you know how I know I make the right decisions?
God gives me signs—He sends the right people at the right time to help me find solutions.
Before my cross country move, in the middle of my anxiety, and after I prayed, two of my friends approached me and mentioned that they knew people in Philadelphia. They each connected me with them. Immediately after my plane landed in Philly, I was greeted by two people I had never met before, Grace Basi and Ahmad Waleed. We toured Center City, I had my first cheese steak, which by the way was not from Pat’s or Gino’s. I quickly learned that locals do not get their cheesesteak from Pat’s or Gino’s, and they explained the public transit system to me. The gesture, totally unexpected. I could feel their care, and this kindness now that I look back at it. It was God’s way of assuring me that I was going to be okay. And when I first worshiped in that local congregation, the ministerial worker Brother Jeffrey Domingo, and his entire family were already expecting me! It was like I had already found a place and a family there.
God made a way to show me that my decision to move was right. I only planned to spend a couple years in Philadelphia… I ended up spending 6! After graduating from Drexel University, I found opportunity after opportunity, kept a long distance relationship with my now husband (PJ), and was still able to perform my various duties.
Speaking of PJ, I was so confident about him. I mean he checked all my boxes:
He was a Church officer, super active in the KADIWA, very smart and handsome. Okay that last one was a plus, I was mainly concerned about the first three boxes. At any rate, I knew I had met my match. However there was one thing I was not so sure about…
PJ decided to join the military and at that stage in our relationship, we were already engaged. I had a ring on my finger! I was scared because my immediate thought was- how are we going to attend Worship Services? I don’t want to be hours away from the closest place of worship. How was I going to sing in the choir? I was having trouble envisioning what kind of future we would have together, so we prayed about it. We asked God that his assignment not be in the middle of nowhere and that we not be too far away from a chapel. And guess what? God gave us exactly what we asked for. PJ’s first military assignment was at the Pentagon and our first home together, just ten minutes away from the Temple Hills chapel. God made a way!
You see, things have a way of working out, but it’s not because of me, it’s all because of God. I don’t want to sound like a broken record, but God always makes a way as long as I do my part. That’s why I’m constantly praying and building my relationship with Him.
We recently had an awesome Worship Service led by the Executive Minister and the topic was about how nothing is impossible with God. The example mentioned was of Gideon and how he and his small army were able to defeat a large force. All because Gideon trusted, had faith, and did exactly what God wanted him to do. So I always try to emulate Gideon’s trust and obedience.
When I look back on some of the big moments of my life, some of these that I’ve shared with you tonight. You know moving to a big city, landing my first job, getting married, there seems to be this pattern…When I have to make a decision, sometimes I’ll get scared and doubt myself but when I pray and have faith, God makes a way. You’re probably thinking, “You shouldn’t even doubt yourself in the first place!”, right? But it reminds me I need to rely on God and I love relying on God because he has provided me with the best possible outcome. Imagine if I made all my decisions without consulting God? I’d probably be miserable. God is all knowing, He is almighty, and He is AMAZING! That’s why even if sometimes I doubt myself, I never doubt in Him, because God always makes a way. Thank you.
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