Finding the “Perfect Guy”
Audrey Rosal: The day that someone tells you, “I love you,” can leave you feeling one of two ways; you’re either speechless and elated, or you’re speechless and absolutely confused. This story is about the latter.
6 years ago I was at a time in my early 20s as a young adult doing things for me – hanging out with friends, going to school, going on trips, filling my time being an active officer in the church. Because that’s what made me happy. At that point in my life…I had already been in a few relationships that didn’t work out. Which was okay, because that time was about me.
And then HE came along. He “slid into my DM‘s” as the young folks would say, a complete stranger. He was tall, dark, and handsome. an active officer in the CWS, choir, and district KADIWA. Loves kids, loves music, loves helping others. Check, check, and check.
He was everything I imagined the “perfect guy,” would be – super personable, charming, completely terrible at responding to text messages right away (like me). But also the kind of guy that I always thought was way beyond my league. So I prayed, asking, “God is this too good to be true?”
Months pass and things are going very well. Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome (or Mr. TDH for short) he reached out to my closest friends to arrange a surprise visit meeting for the first time in-person (and- I LOVE surprises). And among those friends was one of my oldest and dearest friends, someone that I knew was going to be the friend that I would grow old with, my brother for life, the uncle to my children.
So the day came – we meet, and Mr. TDH tells me we’re going to get dinner. And it was supposed to be just the two of us. Without my friends. Well, me being very nervous, I begged each one of my friends to please be with me at this dinner. And none of them wanted to go because they wanted us to “bond, to get to know each other, to enjoy our time together,”
But seeing my nervousness, my friend asked, ”do you want me to come with you?” And with utmost relief, knowing I could always count on him, I said, “Yes, PLEASE.”
Several months passed after that first date with Mr. TDH; we had a great time and we did enjoy each other‘s company. And someone once told me that you need three things to make a good relationship: God, chemistry, and timing. And though we had chemistry, and he checked off everything I thought defined “the perfect guy,” it wasn’t the right time.
And God made sure that I knew that.
So….things didn’t work out with Mr. TDH. Long-distance is a challenge, timing was off and as time went on my prayer also shifted from “is this too good to be true” to “show me the man you want for me.”
And several months later I’m on a call with my friend, my brother for life….the guy who I always pictured to be the “cool and faithful” uncle to my children and my lifelong best friend. And he says, ”I am in love with you. But I’m not expecting anything. I just needed you to know.“
(Trust me I was surprised too!)
And I won’t go into the details of that conversation that night, and remember I LOVE surprises… but I was also very speechless and very confused. This guy was my best friend. We had spent most of our lives around each other, our parents were good friends.
So I kept praying – praying for clarity in the confusion of my emotions, of the fear of losing a friend if I decide to pursue this relationship, but most especially for guidance – that whatever God plans, I will follow.
And suddenly, everything that was average changed. Hanging out with the KADIWA turned into me looking for him. A great day at work, I wanted to let him know. The New York cheesecake pancakes I was eating, I wanted to save some for him later. And our conversations turned into moments I never wanted to end. And before I knew it, I realized that what I had been praying for, what I was asking for God to help me see – had been there right in front of me all along. I just needed to stop trusting in my own ideas of what’s perfect and instead look to God’s guidance.
Four years later, after embarking on a journey of becoming CWS teachers together, singing in the choir together, and leading the KADIWA in our district together (and with our parents’ guidance and full support)—I am now engaged to the one who was supposed to be the cool uncle to my children, the one who beat the brother zone, and preparing to marry and grow old with my best friend.
No, RJ wasn’t Mr. TDH many years ago. But he is The One God had planned for me. And that is the best surprise that I could’ve ever prayed for.
So for all of you who are praying for the “perfect person” …remember your standard for perfection may not be as perfect as what God has in store for you.
What is perfect, are all the gifts God gave you. So hold on to them, and keep praying. Because what he has planned for you will be the perfect surprise.
He has the perfect surprise waiting for you.
