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My Hardest Season Was God’s Greatest Lesson

Jamie thought she was fine. But God could see the drift. And He used her hardest season to bring her back to the path she was meant to be on.

Jamie Santos had always wanted to be a mom. And when she finally got pregnant with her first child, it should have been the happiest season of her life.

Instead, she found herself in a hospital bed — diagnosed with lupus, malnourished, and carrying a baby the doctors weren’t sure would survive.

What happened next would force her to confront something she hadn’t fully seen until that moment: that every decision she had made in the years leading up to that hospital bed had been quietly moving her farther from God. Not dramatically. Not all at once. Just one seemingly tiny decision at a time.

This is a story about what happens when you finally stop resisting. And what God does the moment you say yes.

Episode Timestamps

00:00 Cold Open: A Blessing They Almost Said No To 

01:23 Meet Jamie: Family, Faith, and the Dream of Motherhood 

03:17 When Morning Sickness Became Something More 

04:15 Critically Low: The Blood Work That Changed Everything 

05:46 Sent to UCLA: The Lupus Diagnosis 

07:16 Malnourished and Carrying a Baby Who Wasn’t Growing

 09:06 The Emotional Weight of a Life Upended Overnight 

14:36 The Appointment She Made — And the Shame She Still Carries 

16:17 The Moment Her Husband Walked Into the Room 

19:49 The Decision That Changed Everything: Why It Happened 

22:11 The Pattern: How Every Step Away From God Adds Up 

25:27 The Doctors’ Complete 180 

29:06 The Birth

32:25 How Changing Her Prayers Changed Her Life 

33:17 The First Time She Laid Eyes on Ezra 

36:09 The Best Time to Stay Close to God 

41:05 Would She Have Chosen a Lighter Path? 

42:19 What She Learned About God Through All of It 

42:33 Meet Ezra: Four Years Old, Social Butterfly, Living Proof 

44:10 The Promise She Made to God 

45:57 If You’re Going Through Something Right Now 

47:24 The Second Pregnancy: A Gift After the Storm 

48:30 The Full Circle: Back in the Choir 

50:01 Same God, New Prayers: How She Faces Challenges Now 

53:53 Life Without God: “I Would Be So Lost” 

54:20 What She’ll Teach Her Kids 

56:08 The Promise She Made 

01:05:27 Renewing Your Mind: The Blueprint God Already Gave Us 

01:07:15 For Anyone Who Feels Like They’re in That Hospital Right Now 

01:09:11 Rapid Fire: Faith, Motherhood, and the Power of Prayer

Jamie is so wise beyond her years. It’s amazing how clearly she connected the dots in her story and how she’s been able to track it back to a single, seemingly harmless decision. 

And yes, she never intended it to be a permanent change. But even in that first year, she could already feel it inside her…the resistance. 

Maybe you’ve felt that same way before? Because struggle doesn’t always start with a traumatic event. Sometimes it’s taking teenee, tiny steps away from the path God wants you to be on, even momentarily… and before you know it…you don’t even see how far off course you’ve gone.

But God notices. Just like in Jamie’s story, He’ll use the difficult moments, the ones we’d never choose for ourselves to remind us that He’s there. Waiting to help. Waiting to rescue us. Waiting for us to experience His answer to our prayers.

So if you’re feeling like you’re trying your best but things aren’t falling into place or maybe you know someone who is feeling God’s pull in a certain direction but is still resisting Jamie’s story will be a reminder to take a moment to reflect and see if you’ve stepped off the path God has laid out for you. Maybe there’s a change you’ve got to make too.

Mentioned in the episode:

  • Read: Teaching Kids to Love God Whom They Can’t See at incmedia.org
  • Watch: How to Make Sense of Difficult Times on the INC Media app or incmedia.org

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My Hardest Season Was God’s Greatest Lesson